Is modern life making you rage clean the kitchen? Ask the Snarkarellas for advice. They're the Cinderellas of snark.
Do you feel like you're not being heard? Is someone getting your knickers in a twist ? And this a bit about knickers a bit later on who will like hope . But is someone getting your goat ? Well , then , this is the podcast for you . Each episode we ask you what is on your list, the shit list ?
Hello , I’m Rella . And with may I have the ever wonderful cohost Snark .And look , we are the Snarkarellas and we are the Cinderellas of snark . And we're coming to you from the inaugural snack Carella retreat . A beautiful , beautiful retreat .
We've come alive for the entire weekend and we had quite a road trip to get here . Fuck wits everywhere .
I kind now I must place a Warning. This episode will potentially have a lot of coarse language . So if you're around small children , if you've got this on , perhaps on in the car, or if you don't like dirty language or you might be at work, I suggest you are either put your head phones on , listen to it at a time that's a bit more private .
Yes . And this episode, it’s a very special episode .Because we will be talking about a number of things . And one of them will be a thing called fuck wittery . And we're going to get into that in a moment because I have to tell you about out Journey to the inaugural snark retreat.
Now midday was the time that we had to leave in order to get on the road to get here and snuck turned up always , always on time . And you know what ? I haven't really told you this before , Snark . Thank you so much . You are one of the one of the people who is always on time . Yet my husband was in the defense forces . So if he drops me off somewhere , I'm always early because they're terrified of being light . Because , I don't know , I think you get court martialed and sent to the boiler room.
Okay , so we used to saying that your husband it's not you . Yes . All right , well , I'll take that back . And also thank you .
Too Humid . A later stage . But 12 o'clock you turned up and okay , The first thing I heard that comment of your mouth laws allow our I've got no any bad because I went to AC quit therapy for the middle aged , and I thought together the change in there .
I thought I had a pair of black Lundy's , but it was a pair of black socks and I had a skirt on . But I just thought Pockets , let's go to war was my field . So we went to war with my field .
We did pick up a pair of Shall I call them bloomers and we'll be able to have a few photos of these bloomers on cotton tails . Certain health at the latest day , and there were 30% off good price , good price and a beautiful beige color . And we like a high waist lover highways .
If it's not up to the chip , it's not on no , and these are giant enormous . I would put them on ice , laughed and laughed , but they are pretty coffee . But can I just say that although we got the underwear at Woolworth's that is sent off , we still have to drop the whole way up here with snark without underwear the whole way . Ha ha ha . she there wasn't anywhere convenient to be able to stop . I was looking forward to putting the modern than may feel Willie's cop on .
But there were a few of the locals looking around , and I just You don't want to do anything extreme there . Now I have a trivia fact . My friend Janie works . It Will was corporate , and she told me that was my field that has the housed amount of cigarettes of any war was in Australia . And they do something like 1/4 of a million dollars in cigarettes die . That is incredible . And entirely Yeah , So you can understand why I just didn't want Oh , people BC They're on a mission to get their nicotine . There's no way I want them to see my bunch . Okay , so it's nicotine , not knickers at my football with Okay , So he or right and it is beautiful . Look , we are at a farm . We have got the whole 15 acres to roam around and ramble . I'm not fucking walking anyway . I'm not rambling . She's like , I'll go and look in the shed . Fuck off . What ? We're looking at old shit . Look , So we'll take a photo , and I showed her later . But anyway , it is beautiful . We've got wine , we've got cheese , we've got cheese . ALS . We've got all sorts of delicious things , like Tim Terms . But most importantly , we've got each other's company , and it's a chance for us to get together and talk about something called Fah . Quick , hurry ! I'm so glad I've got this weekend ahead of us because fuck glittery for about depository wakes . I've been attacked for the past three . Wait to buy fuck wits . Did you know that the full moon tonight ? Well , it doesn't surprise me , does it ? Um , So forget what is back with Zuri . How do we define that ? I don't know . All fuck wit . Each concert , Bridget Jones's diary and the two movies , Right ? And what fuck whitish is It's a version on the expression of mind . Fuck ! Okay , especially in the dating world . But I think it's evolved a bit more now . Fuck witchery . Fuck with each . You can use it in it . Judge daily lot . So it means to manipulate another person or inconvenience another person by baby being just totally I have no idea . So what ? People who plan in front of you in traffic and they're going really fast when they pull out . But then all of a sudden they go as slow as anything and inconveniences everyone that's fucked . Witchery behind a wheel . Okay , which we've all experienced . Well , I think so . Yeah , we did today . You had people up your bottom . I had bomb sniffers . Now this , I think , is classic . This is from the Bridget Jones that there's a dark I'm not a darling . There's a Okay , I'm a writer and I cannot remember the word dictionary . Bridget Chance . There's a Bridget Jones dictionary online . Now I'll give you some annoying behaviors by fuck wits sign that will ring and then not ring . That's a big 10 yes , shaving others and then not calling them . Can I just stop you there in that 1st 1 saying that read . And then they won't . What's even worse is saying that you wipe ring and then you do . Oh , it's a shock to the system . It's annoying . Who wants to talk on the final day ? Have they get your number in this imaginary scenario ? You know , maybe they have my number , but usually you prefer them just a text . Just tell me ticks don't ring me . And I thought I'm talking about the old days like the Bridget Jones Day way . Had two hits in the fine that you didn't wait . Um , so this is a good one . Sharing others . They're not calling them well , without any tricks . Do when they don't find that Not okay . Being in relationships with others and then sign . It's on a relationship . Yes . Okay , I'm going out with someone for 12 years while insisting they don't want to get too serious . Okay , Daniel Cleaver would do that . He's the protagonist , Okay , He would One of the protagonists in Bridget Jones's Diary . Have you seen that on the third movie ? No , heaven , this is not giving it away our economies . But there's like a ceremony for Daniel Cleaver and all these Russian supermodels turn up to the ceremony . Ha ! Hilarious . He's still a pants man , Um , and yes , refusing to go on many breaks , which you and I don't have that problem . Well , that's right , because we do . So if you guys wanna now , I'm just gonna get to the quickest thing first that happened . I got one of those . Centaline Robo did it . It's four and 1/2 $1000 . And today that will like . Oh , we can you pay now . Are you sure you can't pay now ? I I don't want Pak . Well , wouldn't you rather pay it off and still have the money in your pocket ? I think . Anyway , I think it's a bit of a mistake and we'll sort it out yet , but I'm gonna pay them back . 50 bucks away is not giving them four and 1/2 grand has a lump sum . So look with top that robot . It's for a while . They are evil . Someone needs to challenge it in court . But let me just say that the fact that I'm acting really I'm ruffled about that really emphasizes the attack of the fuck wits office saying , Well , that's right , because I would have thought that is quite a big thing . And like I'm looking at you now , you'll come . Yeah , really , that I could do with that being robot dated . But what I can't deal with is when strange men knock on my door and Doug leave , and especially when I've just walked out of the shower and also a tail around May and always hearing come back late up come throw you out with that six times and he kept standing there , and I was getting more and more are right . Who is this guy ? I'll tell you in a minute . So the problem was for May to I lift the sunroom blinds open in my bedroom , blinds open . Hey , soul mate . And I saw a human . I was like , this were he's not going away . And then I started to freak out because I had left the back door open . So I snuck into my room . I got my Mattel Agus card again . You know , they really stretching out , right ? Stretched it over to me because I knew my fine was in my room was bad call triple zero . And then I said , Come back light up And he was probably in there . Go a couple of minutes and he saw No , I'm here to get the laugh . What way ? We don't even have a letter . Anyway . He left , but I was about to ring the cops . So I got on my local community page and I was like , Have you guys seen this guy ? And my husband said he came Harmony said , Oh , I think he's a major radar and and made his inside because , he said , I saw a guy walking around the corner with curly gray hair is really weatherbeaten skin and also all hope so because he had it Flora vest on . But we had a problem in my community all few days ago where there was someone pretending to Bay Australia powers . That's right . You can't trust anyone know . So I got on there . What's going on ? Why's this freight them ? The general consensus was ring the cops and then someone sent me a message and she said , I have just think of just seeing him . She said the reason why he didn't hear you was because he had headphones on . Oh , okay , I guess you gotta go put on the headphones and you can't hear so miscommunication . But when an old lady tells you to get off her doors to get the fuck off , that's right . Especially if she's wearing nothing but a card again covering her body . Exactly . So then my husband comes home and I tell him , and he laughs . Excuse made from your position and my privilege , he goes , Oh , don't start with me about that bullshit , you know not like that . And I said , Yeah , well , I was worried I was gonna kill me . And you think it's funny ? Yeah , fuck off , Husband On the least , hes on the least . I'm turning myself , by the way , and it is a very lovely fan . It's a knife pink fair with Poke it off , which I'll have to take a little bit of it later because we're in like a a room to good sound . But the problem , ese that smoke's getting in my throat a beat and you find another devil . It's it's more sort of smoke residue from there's an open fireplace in here smoke residue . Before that , this is the first world problem We could smoke when you are on a real farm . It was , and there was a farmer . Or yes , we saw Farmer Jones we kidded , or so you've got robo debt and you've got a random guy who's turned up on your door and would not leave . And there's something else that I can't go into detail . We'd other than to say it is ajar . Enormous act , and you know me . I'm an open book . Arman open share on Are you Are you an over sharer , but I can't talk about these , but let me just say it's just been a terrible wake in the full moon . What are we gonna do ? We got a dinner . If there's weed us well , but at night , but what I think will handle it . Can I tell you a story ? Yes . Place wants my friend Kate . Merrill and I were having Dina in the city , and I think I was drunk . But I'm just gonna explain to you , when I was in my twenties and thirties off fucking awesome , I didn't take any sheep , right ? We're sitting down . And did I ? Well , the whole time . This is guarding emotionally abusive and brood to his girlfriend at the next table . Yeah , and it was really close . And how's his ? Just pissing me . You know , it doesn't take much to peace . May off . That's what we got . This podcast . Yeah , but it can't go on going . And even Kite was agreeing with me , and she's pretty even tempered . So he keeps going and going . And then after we paid our turnaround , looked him in the ice and make your own asshole and we let her back . But then for my birthday . We went and got pizza , and he was there in case there's that asshole . So the joke is on May . Oh , look , you have got the best memory of anyone I've known . Yeah , but communists trying to your last hole , Um , in a restaurant , Something you'd remember , you would say it was fucking Britta . Yeah , Something would just speak terribly . Don't do today . Significant others . Yeah . So anyway , that was one of the Olsen things . All right , well , are there any other stories that you have around that's happened to you ? That's around ? Fuck wittering . Oh , from the internet all the time . Papal doesn't ? Absolutely . But that look , I've just been focusing on the three main things in my life . But other people have got some problems . And it's not just fuck withering . Well , that's right . And , you know , we do ask that you put on the least what's getting up you go . What's annoying you ? What is absolutely giving you the ships because it is the sheet list . Yes . So we post it once awake in the stock , a relic group , and then on the stock gorilla page . And we say we put some random stuff on there . But there's some universal things , isn't they ? Absolutely . There's lots of things on there . Like , let me just go through the least now . So the absolute top wanted The market is that people are feeling you feeling tired back ? Well , you know , may I'm on legal medication to keep me awake on narcolepsy medication . And I don't have narcolepsy . It's old legal . It's all fine . But the I could tell you advice . As I said , you're bein a slight for years . Yeah . Okay . What about you ? You're tired . You've got three jobs , if you can't . This one . That's right . I do work three jobs as well . As , you know , raise a child , run 1/2 extraordinary lover squirrel through Facebook , which takes up a lot of time and energy watching Facebook fight . So , you know yes , I can totally relate to being tired . Um , and I think a lot of people are feeling tired and often you find sort of coming out of the end of winter . People are feeling like that . Yeah , well , I just think having a bit more sunshine helps . It's allowed . Does absolutely . Okay . The next one is health . Yes . This one comes up a lot . Well , I think people days dies , Have a lot of chronic conditions . Like pine Nick back me ? Um , cold flu depression ? Absolutely . Yeah . So I think it's sort of the iceberg . Worried , but healthy is big one . Mmm . And you know , like , healthy is one of the things that is the most important . And when you don't have it , you know , said United did Archie , Why does till my probiotic Beautifully , quick . How the hell do you do that ? What did Ugo ? I'll show it to you . It's like a liquid . It's really , really good . It actually helps keep me a white because , well , I found that as Assad . If it because it's got ill . So it's this little beautiful , um , the beauty shift does it , and it's like it tastes like coconut . But I started getting a bit liberal with the doses I was giving myself estimated . I'll tell you what , I was running to the toilet . Quite a beat . Okay , so it's a good cleanser . Yes . So , yes , but our deed , I've dosed myself to the point where it was a beating . Convenience ? Yeah . Careful on your beauty supplements . Okay , Well , in that case , getting back to the nick a story ? Yes . Was it really ? Because you forgot your knickers and only had black soft ? Or was it a side effect from overdosing ? Well , you know , I'm a you know what I'm like . I I'm very vague . Could have positively done that now Zuccarello society unwired about your health , Mom . Yes . Well , not you only snark . I'm addressing it to out Judy , audience of community , the snack Carella Society . Okay , Yeah , we're not happy . We we just want you guys to be feeling Gordon being at your optimum , but hopefully some of these health problems alike coughs and colds and allergies that go away . That's right . Okay , The next one is the state of the world . That's a big topic . I just had to do one of those meditation births in did you ? It is luck and the state of the world , you know , and this could bay grand and beak . But it could bay like my world , the stony in my world as well . That's a good point . So but I'm sort of assuming that it's the state off the world , the big world with stuff we can't control . That's right . Well , as I was saying , to you . I'm just horrified . While the lack of maybe er entrance that the Jeffrey abstain six criminal cases getting yeah , that is just so massive it involves Royalty involves allegedly presidents and whole supermodels and Hollywood stars , influential people who have got power and control . So place buys . Just Google . Jeffrey abstain because I think this citizens , we all need to know about it . Don't you agree ? Uh , it's , but it's depressing . So if you're feeling a bit sad , maybe not . I feel like it's my duty to keep up with it . I'm a bit obsessed , but hopefully Justice will come all It's starting to , I think may choose one of the most significant things that's happened in our lifetime . Don't you agree ? Uh , definitely . The thing about it steam Waas . A lot of people knew he did it like openly . He didn't hide it . No , that's right , because he had money to be able to stop the consequences . What did you say before ? If you've got money , you just need that extra high all the time because she can get what you want and you know more people . And that's right there . We just need that little bit more because that it's the thrill of it . I'm giving her a quiz tonight on Abstain . So I said might show you paying attention . So it's at five o'clock at the quiz . Um , it's farther non already . Oh , my God , I'm late . Let's do it . 7 30 We could live back yet . Um , and the only unfortunate thing is there's not a very good wife . I hear it's not gorilla retreat , So I got good all the answers , can't you ? Okay , we'll do it in the morning or we got state of the world . So that's a put The next one is another major one this Ah , lot of new things going on in people's lives . Money , money . Oh , look , I just say people who are hanging out until they put their tax return in yet . Absolutely . Yeah , It certainly adds a lot of stress . Um and well , I've got guitar the other day . Beautiful car . I'm so happy because the cow that we did have so it's got a broken down clutch , and it's a European clutch , so costs $1700 to fix . And it was very old car , so we borrowed my friends , my husband's friend's car It's beautiful . It was a convertible , but the problem waas the engine didn't turn over all the time . So you have to try a few times , so it's quite going to get in the car . I haven't driven it yet , so but you're getting in it at least . Yes . So my husband's driven it . And my nephew who sold me the car's driven it . But yes , I said , Yeah , people are very , very careful with their financial decisions at the moment . Are they ? May I got involved ? A demonstration , huh ? Well , that's showing a bit of caution . Know Farrah , Honestly , that car that I had that silver car , it didn't really say that Life's once what happened ? Waas . We're in the country going to see my husband's family , and the council closed the road one way , but not the other . So we're driving down and you know one of those things called there like a galley thing , whether stone mortar all accumulates and usually they're empty . And next to it's like a sign of how many bullets way a causeway , which I wouldn't cross there . And it was like Simi flooded and outcomes her , but it got out and it was like the little engine had called me like , Oh , I can't love you . But that could have been serious . Bloody chancel . But you off the leash our next . We have messages that caused greater pain and suffering . That was made last week . What happened ? Remedial massage . I'm not booking it again . I should've just got re lax ation . Yeah . Yet Remedios Ouch . Sounds good . The night . Yep . Some people love them all . Look , I liked it , actually , but the next day I didn't feel good . What Waas is I kind of had a knot in my heap on one of her moved Next thing in online on the stomach with my fade out like a lizard like a duck . What ? That we have melon tea Will do . Do you have Mel ? Yeah . Duck malice . Um , yes . So that wasn't my best idea , but I'm alright now . I went to middle aged . Quit therapy . Yeah , Good on . We were going to book into a spot to have a bit of a spa day tomorrow , but we're gonna work . Yeah , we've got too many commitments , You know , we don't have time to relax . Okay ? Now , the final thing that's on the least now I love this . Do you ? Because you know why ? Because we've got all of these other things at the top , but tired and health and the start of the world and money . And then we have pimple . Well , fair enough . I love it because this is a small problem that someone is not afraid to put their hand up and say I have it . I am annoyed at something like a people . Well , but it can't baby can grow in your wake . Okay ? I remember my first engagement party . I had a massive zit there , and it's all you can say in the photos . Look , you can try and cover it up , but all you end up doing is making it angrier and rida and enhancing it . It was one of those ones that soul , even when you don't touch like a blind little orange one . Yet did it start drunk ? Did about . I can't probably deed . But remember in those days you know how people get the full court glam squad yet ? I got my hair done , but I did my own makeup and I had this flower in my hair . That baby got there It like two in the afternoon from the florist was looking a bit my people at the end of the night . Yeah , well , I kind of the people it can ruin . Oh , you know , if it's a big major deal , lug it an engagement party , a wedding . You know , you've got an important meeting yet and you need to a powerful . Yet you've got something erupting pass coming out of your face that's not called . Everyone focuses on and you try not to . But I always look at other people's pimples . I can't do you ? Do you know what my sister loves to pop peoples ? Do you know that these people who are just pimple poppers , they love to do it ? Have you seen Dr Pimple pop on the Hallmark card ? Watch it . Can't you know she's OK ? It's not all that part's what she goes in . And like season things when snow cats or anything no is usually just a fantasist . Plenty hill anyway , must be stopped . I've gone visitor and I'll be there , you know , 10 minutes and she'd have the shirt on my back whipped up and she'd be at my back like some sort of a monkey . She should have become a king around for blackheads . And , of course , you know , you know , my beautiful skin . I don't have any yet , so But she'd be trying to bond black kids . She touched an obsession with it . And Chief Mike noises like , Whoa , that's sassy . I Yeah , my ambition is to become a , um , a beautician or something . You know what ? Get us some places . You know , the extractions . Yeah , Well , anyway , people is on the least yet pimple stuff . You pimple stuff . You're on the list , actually . Can I decide and asking ? Cool . Oh , they're the worst . They are the world . What about a boil ? I've never I've had something that I suspected to be about , But I never actually had it confirmed by a medical professional that it was a boil , but it looked like it . Mike , I imagine a boiled would look like Was it on the bomb ? Yes . Um , have you ever had hives ? No , I've had hives on . They will . They're massive , huge welts . Oh , I thought he had them once in my life . I think I was about non , but I remember . Yeah . Yeah . Okay . Well , okay , so that's on the least . Pimples peoples have hives and boils and boils . But I'm not gonna put people poppers on there because I think this applies for people . Corpus . Hold There is . I thought I had in the world , so I have a problem . Oh , my goodness . OK , I've got two cysts in my head , right ? It's so that snark is actually showing her ceased . All right , so I've got the sissy , That kind of Lachlan devil horns . I have this one removed by a dermatologist in lantern . He talked , like , six months to get into , but he did warn me . He said it might grow back , son . The little fuck it did grow back . But when we lived in Bali , right , but they disappeared . This one just disappears . What in heaven ? And I'm done around her . Colmar don't have devil horns stuff . Well , now I've got this one . It's new . And then that one . And they're just like cece full of Carrollton . Okay , so if you were in , say , the seventh century and you shut up with the pair of devil horns Well , I'm a witch like I'm an absolute which my friend Jenny and I were a proud to say We witches , She's gonna come out with us this weekend and bring her ghost hunting equipment . Yeah , but yet they would be walking around . I'm showing her across like that , and I'm looking at the cross . Do you want to touch it ? All right . I'm gonna have a fail . Let me have a It's like a whole one . Oh , my God . I It's like a It's not spongy . It's quite bony . Risk . It's boom . It's firm . It's not too spongy . Yeah , Okay , I can confirm that . That is a ceased . And what about this one ? Which one do you thinks bigger ? Because I think this to e . Or are you ? You're right . Ceased . He's the big one . Yes , but this is the big daddy . That look all okay ? It's a reincarnation . That's the beginning . One that grew back then disappeared . I can That grew back . Oh , hi . All right , Well , on that night , enough about my cysts . But we can do like her life . If anyone would like to see them up close because it's weird . It's like I got devil horns , isn't it ? It is lucky . Do you feel like it ? But to be honest , I cannot even see them through your mane of here . Yeah , but I wanted them removed because I just hate it . I don't that look of obsessed by them , but I heip them at the same time . They're part of you . Okay ? You just say to accept who you are . Thank you for that . And that's my bit of motivational management Gables . Yep . Absolutely . Well , listen , I'm gonna sign at as I wait Show beaches . Thank you for listening to us . Let us know what's on your least . We're gonna record another one while we hear it won't buy . Yes . Absolutely . Well , after we've had a knot in the farmhouse where we can sort of stopped looking a bit more about our adventures spot ? Absolutely . Could you tell them how , Sam Person room ? It's very soundproof . This room , it's behn practice . It's not been a lot of time in the cording studio or the good room in the farmhouse is I like to call it . And she tried to block the window up because , you know , sound does reflect off glass . Um , it's an assortment off . I'm gonna have to take a little while , but Vega will put it on the pile and shot a National Geographic We've got a picture of the D and we have got a mindfulness coloring book . That's all they used as a waitress screen or protect . Sort of the sound . So this does sound there can get out . But look , what can you do ? Really ? I tried my best . I hurt . The sound is optimum . I'm sorry if it's not well , if the sounds not optimum , the content is well . Yeah , it is . It is . All right , well , that's off signing out . Thank you very much to see you on the stock . Carella Pedro Instagram . Oh , hi .1Transcribed by Whooshkaa Transcribehttps://whooshkaa.com